I should be sleeping but I'm still on this damn laptop. After a month, (almost two) of losing my data, losing my contacts, losing my addresses, losing my phone numbers, losing people, losing my shit....where was I?
Tonight I turned to Pearl Jam, and listening to music I now remember as my high school days. Tonight I caught the glimpse of marijuana grow-ops on National Geographic. Tonight I saw Tom Ford talk about his life, while always wearing a shirt with at least the first three buttons undone. (Thank you Oprah for telling us how to live). Tonight I recall New York. Tonight I almost call the ex. Tonight I feel like Charlotte, sitting on the couch, watching the doc about Elizabeth Taylor.
The laundry is half in the washer, half in the dryer. I tried to finish it, but it can just be added to the list of what I haven't done.
I should be happy for today. Happy of the better-than-usual alone time with my mom. Happy that there was sunshine. Happy my boyfriend didn't blow up along with his motorcycle. Happy I am, to those degrees and for all those fleeting moments of good times and good news. But now I know happiness doesn't stay or keep (like the fruit I still try to keep in that bowl, on that table) so it's kind of bullshit to the bin in the end.
